The Britney Factor

For some reason, myself included, we can't help but be fascinated by the whole Britney Spears thing. But why? Surely there are more interesting people. There are more compelling news stories.

I have a few ideas why . . . I think she, and her troubles represent our collective fears as well as reflect our society in a stark way.

One, she was a child who was portrayed by her sexuality at a very young age. In a way, she was sexually abused by the world. She was given the idea at a tender age that her only real worth was her body and how she used and gave us access to it. I can only imagine what it does to your self image for PepsiCo to "digitally enhance" a your teen aged bust line to sell more soda pop.

Two, she more or less embodied what has become the new American dream . . . to make it big in show business. But she doesn't seem to have much of a safety net. Heiresses like Paris Hilton have the whole of their families to stand behind them if they fall . . . but girls like Britney have their whole family falling with them. It isn't fair that she was put in a position to support her family at such a young age.

Three, she has made quite a few mistakes . . . and a few calculated moves . . . none of which she seems to have recovered from. There was the 54 hour marriage. Then there was stealing a man from another woman who was pregnant. The quick pregnancies . . . which would tax anyone. The parties. The pictures. The courting the cameras. The shocking behavior that didn't do anything for her image. It seems that she moves from bad judgement to bad judgement. I don't know if she is refusing good advice or not getting it.

Four, I think she has become the embodiment of the "bad mother." I think all women who have children worry that they will be bad mothers. Every mom I know questions herself daily. I can't help but think that moms everywhere are both saddened and repulsed by Britney. And I suspect moms everywhere thank the stars they don't have every move documented the way she does.

Five, she's in a mess and it isn't clear how she's getting out. Unfortunately, she doesn't seem inclined to check into rehab and take it seriously. She doesn't seem terribly capable of taking control of her life in a meaningful way. Other young stars take time out for college . . . or they drop out . . .work on themselves, and then pop back on the scene. I think it would take even more of what's going down for Britney to feel that she's hit bottom.

I see this last thing with lots of clients. They feel that they are in a fish bowl . . . that everyone around them can see right through them. They have gotten into a rut of how they react to their lives . . . and it appears that it will take monumental strength to make changes . . . strength they don't believe they have. But ultimately, for all of us, we have to live our own lives . . . do what is right for us . . . and not worry if people are looking or not. That's a whole lot easier said than done.